Kaivalya

When she makes me blush 'Is it love?' I ask myself And desire her touch.

Often I had chanced to ponder on And awe at the wondrous gracefulness With which she manages to climb in The brimming omnibus amidst human mess. Her name, I know not, but I can tell Her's is a beauty which many fancy. Though I'm unsure she bears which fragrant smell- Her cheerful face, even in my dreams, I see. Seldom she opened her little mouth To converse with a neighbor sitting next And spoke in sweetest dialect of the South, Her tongue now moving and now coming to rest. On some hard day, in the crowded bus With effort she strains her nimble feet Would she be angry? I start to guess.. Yet her smiling lips are just as sweet. P.Siddartha Dt:June 2005

I wonder, while the summer breeze Blows splendidly during the noon- Of when this life of mine shall soon By all its virtues come to cease. In forlorn nights of trembling cold When there's no moon to look upon I dream of stars beyond the sun Which glisten brighter than the gold. When 'tis time for the autumn rain That drops so hard causing this pang I think of all the bards who sang Of wealth and strife, of love and pain. I hear slow whispers around me "There is no devil to kill us And no desire to fulfill thus" I understand what I couldn't see. I wish to seek the Truth untold Unknown to many, and hence find The secrets lying in my mind- I shall then become strong and bold. P.Siddartha May 08, 2k5

Lest I mistake this summer rain As Thy blessing to heal my pain Lest I forget, my life of shame Whilst I still chant Thine Holy name Perchance I glance backward at moon, Hoping my dream will come true soon Lest I feel 'tis time to renounce And Thine own words lest I pronounce Do make me wise, let me be right Bless me follow the Divine Light. Before I lose this hazy game Before I burn in flames of blame Allow me chant Thine Holy name Thy name, sweet name, Thine Holy name. P.Siddartha April, 2005

Bear me your countenance And allow me a poet's stance So to sing before her castle Enamoring odes of romance. Longing was I for this fair chance To break this spell of evil trance On my tonsured vocal muscle And produce in blissful nuance A solemn tone reflecting penance I'd done, to be blessed with a glance Of her eyes on my life's puzzle, Unsolved by many and perchance She could, with her perseverance, End my miserable endurance Of this tough grueling battle; Bestow back my significance. P.Siddartha 17/04/05

Shall I bow at Thine holy feet Or gather the dust beneath them And rub my forehead till there’s heat To vaporize all evil from My mind of which, I was so proud; My thoughts of which, I seldom thought. Like Thunder strikes a moving cloud And kills all foes it ever fought, Strike me such as I never had No doubt on my ability To serve Thy kingdom as Thy bard. Bestow me with tranquility; Shower on me kind words of love, Let my honor exalted be. In Thy pure eyes allow me have A nobler place whence I can see Nature and seasons in full bloom The mighty sun; the placid moon; Make me blissful and leave no room To sorrow; hence I start to croon And hum Thy hymns which I invent, As on my art I contemplate Leaving no moment left unspent Caring no King however great; My youth I shall not let go waste By running after wine and wealth; I despise greed and give-up ha...

‘Soul’ is consciousness. Soul is the vision in eyes, strength in muscle, intelligence in mind, feeling in heart and so on. Soul can be of a particle or wave or another intangible form. The basic nature of soul is curiosity- to learn, to know. If you feel conscious of something, then your soul is in action. An intangible form of soul is that which cannot be seen, only felt. Probably, it is a ‘force’ or ‘energy’, which is not tangible but still exists and is real. The soul feels the joys, pains, anger, compassion, love, hatred etc. The true sense beyond all physical senses is the soul. The temporary state of the soul is that what it behaves in the material world. The whole universe is built on the bonds that connect the individual souls. Thus, universe is a collective state of consciousness and a hence a collective soul. Humans lead their lives based on instincts and intelligence. This intelligence is the soul of the human mind. I get back to one of my favorite conclusions that ‘mind’ is...

Notes on pain and pleasure…………………. Part A: Utilitarianism The principle of utility: In “Introduction to the Principles of Morals and Legislation”, Jeremy Bentham (Utilitarianism) included both the principles of human nature and a list of twenty-one offences “to which the condition of a husband stands exposed.” Explanation of Human Nature: “Nature has placed mankind under the governance of two sovereign masters, pain and pleasure. It is for them alone to point out what we ought to do, as well as to determine what we shall do. On the one hand the standard of right and wrong, on the other the chain of causes and effects, are fastened to their throne. They govern us in all we do, in all we say, in all we think: every effort we can make to throw off our subjection, will serve but to demonstrate and confirm it. In words a man may pretend to abjure their empire: but in reality he will remain subject to it all the while. The principle of utility recognizes this subjection, and assumes it for ...

Methinks, that bright blue star yonder in sky Twinkles forever smirking at my soul, The fiery black thunder when storm comes by, Frightens my mind for thoughts I never stole. The might of the mountains standing so high, Make me panic for my lack of hard goal. Perchance, the adept breezes willfully try To disclose my best kept corner-and-hole Causing apprehension as to imply And leaving nothing for me to console My despair'd heart, so inclined to cry, Desolate, desperate like a tadpole Wishing to become a lotus in pond Aloof and free from relation and bond. P.Siddartha Oct,2004.

For You I shall Live, For You I shall die, All those tough things For You I will try. For You I shall breath, For You I will stop, And all my desires For You I will drop. For You I shall eat, For You I will not, To the new qualities of life For You I will sought. For You I shall sleep, For You I will dream, When I'm all alone For You I will scream. For You I shall sing, For You I will talk, Till the ends of the world For You I will walk. For You I will love, For You I will fight, The Divine candle of hope For You I shall light. For You I shall shrink, For You I shall grow, The Essence of my life For You I shall know. P. Siddartha (look for this at: http://steppingstones.to/light/enlightening/fountain/0107.html)

Rains were pouring and the streets were drowning Birds were singing while the wind was dancing , Stars in the sky began shining in the day, This was all when I first saw an angel all the way. Her skin snow-white, she had a jasmine chin, She looked like a prize that I needed to win; Her rose-like lips and her tempting look, Made me wonder if she was a Keats' book. I was in ecstacy when I first heard her, As she moved her tongue her tone was sharp; Her teeth were shining diamonds all white, Her voice was the melody of a musical harp. The pits in which I fell were her cheeks' dimples, The river in which I sank was her silky-dark hair; Her eyes in the dark glowed like blue sapphires, If poetry was my breath then she would be the air. P.Siddartha 10 August, 2000.

The Love that I made was a juvenile crime; For it was not some mad Romeo's child, Which planted in me this desire so wild To evil my mind and kill benign time; As under the influence of a spell Cast by a wild-eyed fairy's sweet romance, I see a recurring dream, lost in trance: Only to be later thrown into Hell. My limbs no more walk to the Temple post; My lips no more sing the prayer Holy; Struck by some ill-conspired melancholy, My heart no more aches for Apollo's ghost Of whom a young bard from past sang aloud, Seeing himself afloat over that cloud.

A Passage to Kodai Kanal (September 11-13, 2004) Part-I Reaching There Nostalgia. How often do we get that feeling? I feel it every now and then. Amidst my deep contemplations, there is always a feeling of nostalgia to get back to my real home: the womb of Mother Nature where rest the graceful woods, mighty peaks and deep valleys. So as to gather the reminiscence of some beautiful past, I along with four of my friends went to observe, learn and enjoy the secrets of Nature personified in the form of the wondrous hill station Kodai Kanal. Kodai Kanal is about 12 hours of journey from Chennai. Murali was the one who proposed to go for a tour of Kodai on the afternoon of September 09, 2004, Thursday. Suddenly, we planned for the tour, and found out that only five of us are interested in the trip. Rest of them were busy with their incessant businesses of doing assignments, project work etc. Now, it was Murali, Raj, Vivek, Sreekumar and I who planned to go ahead for the weekend and s...

If only she were mine I shall not need to pine! Her touch would make me feel so fine Her beauty such a treat to dine Her eyes pouring most strangest wine Her smile more warmer than sunshine Her hairs knit like a cotton-twine Her tempting looks when dressed to nine Her curves some curly creeping vine Her fingers, each ending into a tine And gather in becoming one straight line Her modest speech so sweet and benign And yet her lips in taste saline And from her thoughts when I resign I find solace in her dreams divine And more of her could I define If only she were mine If only she were mine

O stranger- staying at my heart Listen to this new parable, Which I produce with all my art To cause you interest ample. A dream did happen in my life; (A dream that seemed real and true) The nymph with wings holding a knife Approached a man, ailing was who. This man since so long did await The Golden Opportunity Now fell a trap for this dame’s bait That had nor mercy nor pity. She showed him love and wild desire- He lingered in the languid thought; She taught him how to start the fire His purposes all came to nought. Deep rooted evil inside her Gave him a strange satiation; When each body met the other Sin overrode all compassion. Stars were cursing young lover’s fate; The Truth began to show its face. Love rechristened itself as Hate; The knife tore flesh in decent pace. His body trembled; a feared- For, pain was insurmountable. His final time in deed neared- He felt death was but more humble. Something cried inside him aloud (That so...

  A Passage to Uttaranchal (June20-21 & June 27-29, 2004) Although I stayed in Haryana for about 6 weeks for official purposes, I really spent my most valuable and unforgettable time in the divine state of Uttaranchal.This state, endowed with richness of the nature’s true wealth, was without doubt once the land of the demi-gods. The mighty peaks and holy waters of this land have taught my mind to think high and pure. I had spent about five days here, in two separate trips. During my first visit, I had been to meet Aamma who along with other relatives was on a trip to these holy lands. I met her at the Haridwar, perhaps the most ideal place to begin the uncommon quest for the other side of the universe. Mother Ganga (River Ganges), dancing in her many streams, flows with kind of strange wilderness. They say, once you take a dip in the holy Ganga, all your past karma will be neutralized enabling you to be free from the endless cycle. I wondered if the aggressive behavior of the...

  A gentleman, never been called so, Who, in his own style, tried to show The world the way it has to know That individualism must stay and grow. A philosopher of unusual tempo Whose ideas he himself drove To endless heights without slow From existing standards disdainfully low. A saunterer from the holy-lands of snow                   Without pointing his finger or raising his brow        At the downward speed of mankind’s flow Remained aloof, having attained divine glow. A gentleman, never been called so, A philosopher of unusual tempo A saunterer from the holy-lands of snow My hero, Henry David Thoreau .

  Holy water so cold and pure Rending our hearts infinite cure Flow ever in the land of Gods Make rich us, prosper our abodes; With you bring us the Divine Light With you take us to highest height Where white-caps of snow lay pristine Where great winds pious and benign Touch us with ardor of Fathers Sitting in couches of lathers Device the plans for human life Of bliss, sorrow; Of wealth and strife; Gift us with minds of intellect Bless us to become more perfect